ABC’s hit reality show Extreme Makeover Home Edition has helped over 100 worthy families across the United States by rebuilding homes. The show has provided new digs for people of all stripes: firefighters, returning Iraq veterans, adoptive parents, people with disabilities, and more.

But the show’s producers were not prepared for the video plea they were to receive from one Myrna Jenkins of Quincy, Illinois. Jenkins, 87, shared her dilapidated 100 year old farm house with 215 cats that she had acquired over the past several years. She could barely walk across a room without stepping on a half dozen of them. The conditions inside were deplorable. Cat urine and feces were everywhere, makeshift litter boxes were strewn about, and the only way Jenkins could feed the cats was to scatter 25 pounds of cat chow across the floor each day.

Ty Pennington, star of Extreme Makeover, was visibly moved by Jenkins’ plight. “This remarkable woman has been taking in strays for years, giving them a better life,” said Pennington. “But her house is in real need of repair. We have to help this lady and her feline family before it’s too late.”

Bellowing into his trademark bullhorn, Pennington stoked up his cohorts on the bus: “Whaddaya say everybody…let’s do it!”

The next day, Pennington and his crew pulled up in front of Jenkins’ house. Bullhorn in hand, Pennington let out a jarring wake up call. “Good morning, Myrna Jenkins!!!”

The door burst open, and Jenkins emerged, cradling a double-barrel shotgun in her arms. “What the hell do you people want? I told you I ain’t movin,’ now go on outta here! Get off my property! And get that goddamn bus off my lawn!”

After several minutes of explaining by the production crew, Jenkins realized who was at her porch and her paranoia suddenly switched to joy. “Oh, I’m so sorry, young man. My temper just goes from hot to cold, sometimes” Jenkins admitted sheepishly. “I’ve gotta get back on my meds one of these days! Anyhoo, I just hope you can help out me and the kitties. They’re all I’ve got since my dear Edwin passed on back in ‘89.”

“Were going to give you and your clowder of cats a better home,” assured Pennington. “So pack your bags, you’re going to the Cat Fancier’s Cat Show in Shreveport, Louisiana!!! And your cats…they’re going to Sears! The pet department there will fix them up with shots, worm pills and flea and tick collars.”

“Why don’t you c’mon in and meet my kitties,” Jenkins coaxed Pennington.

“Uh…I’m sure they’re a nice bunch of critters, but believe me, I’ll just take your word for it and stay right out here,” replied Pennington. “Hey look! Here comes your ride! Time for you to go…see ya’ in a week!”

Immediately after Jenkins left in the big black limousine, and her cats were removed by the Adams County hazmat team and taken away in several vans, Pennington and his crew brought down the old house. With 30 pounds of dynamite.

All that remained was a smoldering crater littered with splinters of wood from the blast. Men in bright yellow biohazard suits and respirators proceeded to spray down the area with disinfectant and insecticide. A few hours later, bulldozers had covered the site with dirt and the construction began.

Within a few days, a structure emerged on the site. Designers from the show incorporated various cat-friendly features into the house, including rooms filled with carpet-covered “cat-trees,” several dozen scratching posts, and a huge, 12 by 12 foot indoor litter box room equipped with a robotic self-cleaning scoop. All the floors in the house were lined with a waterproof neoprene sheeting, to keep the inevitable urine from seeping into the floor. There was even a fenced-in patio out back, with a big catnip garden for the cats to lounge in.

Seven days after leaving, the black limo triumphantly returned with Jenkins and her ABC entourage. Almost a dozen onlookers from the area were in the yard for the big television event. Humane Society volunteers were busy ferrying the cats out of the vans and back into their new home. Purina  donated a truckload of cat chow. The local police chief even showed up for the unveiling, ready to tear up the 15 or so health department complaints and condemnation order filed against Jenkins, as a gesture of goodwill.

Then the moment came. Through his bullhorn, Pennington shouted his call to arms: “Move that bus!” The bus rolled forward and three cats bolted out from under it, just in the nick of time.

“Oh, it’s a godsend…it’s so wonderful!” exclaimed the exuberant Jenkins upon eyeing her new home for the very first time. “How can I show my gratitude?”

“Umm…well…you can start by not bringing home any more fucking cats,” muttered Pennington, not realizing he was still on-camera. “Uh, yo, better edit that part out, boys, he he!”

The crew proceeded to show Jenkins around the new house, with lots of tears of joy, and lots of cats scurrying about the place. Cat heaven, indeed.

The new episode, renamed Extreme Makeover, Cathouse Edition, is scheduled to air the last week before Christmas. Check your local listings for times.