Tina posed this question to the other AITS staffers in a brain-storming session today: What are some of the nutty things you have done while bored in a tourist town? Everybody here in the newsroom came up with some excellent ideas and they are compiled below, in no particular order. The Dirty Dozen of tacky tourist stunts.

Keep in mind that business people and authorities in tourist locations may not share your enthusiasm for these fun pranks, particularly if you’re anywhere in the bible-belt. Attempt these activities at your own risk and don’t call us for bail money.

1. Stop in at the local Visitor’s Bureau or Chamber of Commerce and ask where the hookers and strip joints can be found. (Note: This stunt will have very little shock effect in places like Las Vegas or Atlantic City.)

2. Walk down a busy street with your video camera and be the “roving reporter.” Ask passersby to give their thoughts on “last night’s grisly murders in town.” Catch their reactions on camera for great YouTube moments.

3. Visit the zoo and bring jalapeno peppers to feed the bears. Be sure to record video for more great YouTube moments.

4. Stop everybody you see on the street and ask how to get to the free clinic.

5. Walk in to a local grocery or hardware store. Inquire (in a rather loud voice) that you are staying at the (___) hotel and need lots of mousetraps/rodent bait/roach spray (take your pick). Repeat this question on everyone you encounter in the aisles. Alternative version: same stunt, except say that you’re the new kitchen manager at (___) restaurant.

6. Draw body outlines with chalk on sidewalks near popular tourist attractions. Lurk nearby and observe people’s reactions. Bonus points if you toss in some fake blood and empty cartridge casings. If you have time, string up some “Police Line” tape.

7. Ask the concierge at your hotel (or any hotel) where you can hop on “that big yellow tour bus that drives by all the crack houses, brothels and meth labs.”

8. Find a busy intersection and busk for spare change, playing “air guitar.” For added effect, set an empty guitar case near your feet for people to toss their money into. See how much you can collect in an hour.

9. Go to a fine restaurant and order the cheapest appetizer on the menu - with water. After eating it, stand up, display your best expression of pure horror, and scream “SOYLENT GREEN IS PEOPLE!!!” Then plunk down the appropriate sum of cash on the table and bolt for the door with your hand over your mouth.

10. Stop back in at the local Visitor’s Bureau or Chamber of Commerce. Ask them why Michael Moore is in town with a film crew interviewing random tourists on the streets. While you’re there, also ask them about “last night’s grisly murders in town” that you just heard about from some other tourist.

11. Write your own parking tickets for cars in the area. Make up bogus “violations” and write them with pen on lined notebook paper. For example: “excessive air in tires.” Sign the bottom with “Have a nice day…and keep (town) weird.”

12. Play “Tourette’s Tourist.” Walk around in a crowded public area while making strange tics and twitches, babbling to yourself and occasionally spouting obscenities and other inappropriate remarks. Stop people to ask for directions while staying in-character.