Rep. Joe Wilson (R-SC) stated today that he is “tired of constantly apologizing to everybody” in the aftermath of his outburst at President Obama’s speech last week. The Congressman from South Carolina became a media lightning rod after he heckled the President by shouting out “liar liar pants on fire!” during Obama’s speech on health care reform.
Wilson feels he has done all that he can do to settle things up.
“I’ve apologized to the President, to Congress, the DNC, the RNC, the news media, my minister, my family…hell, even my dog,” said the distraught Congressman. “I even registered imsorry-dot-com and posted a full-page apology there. Cripes, people on the street come up to me now, wagging their finger and looking for a mea culpa from me.”
“There’s only so much groveling that I can do to satisfy these blood-thirsty bastards,” Wilson continued. “I didn’t mean anything by the remarks. It’s not like I have Tourette’s or something.”
Wilson now drives around Washington with a sign on the door of his SUV, emblazoned with “I said I’m sorry already, so STFU!”
“I think everybody’s received their pound of flesh from me,” added Wilson. “From now on, it’s no more mister nice guy. I really, really mean it this time.”