In the aftermath of the recent “Tailgate” sex scandal, David Letterman has decided to get help for what appears to be a sex addiction. The 62-year-old Late Night host will be checking in to the Linda Lovelace Institute for Sexual Disorders in El Segundo, California, after completing taping of this week’s shows.
“It seems I have a bit of a problem here,” quipped Letterman. “The girls who hang around here…they’re all so…nice. I can’t help myself.”
“I knew I had a problem when Paul started looking good to me,” added Letterman.
Said one staffer, who requested anonymity: “The guy was boinking practically everything that moved in this place. Those interns would be lined up outside his office, waiting to get in for some ’special treatment.’ It’s amazing we get any work done at all in these studios.”
According to sources within CBS, Letterman would often approach young staffers, smoothly offering to buy dinner at Rupert Jee’s Hello Deli and then engage in a tryst in the back room “bunker” at the deli. Jee insists he was not aware of the activity going on in his restaurant and has no further comment.
Meanwhile, Letterman’s cardiologist is concerned with the behavior.
“Dave’s gonna vapor-lock if he doesn’t slow down this lifestyle,” said Dr. Lou Arone. “He doesn’t need another heart attack!”
But Letterman is hopeful his therapy will make him a changed man.
“It’s no more monkey-business for me,” added the popular talk show host. “Six weeks at Lovelace and I’ll be as good as new. Guess I won’t be making any more jokes about Bill Clinton or John Edwards. Or Elliot Spitzer. Or Mark Sanford. Oh snap! I’m gonna need some new material!”















