The vuvuzela, noisemaker of choice for the 2010 South Africa World Cup games, has gained a lot of attention. The plastic horns, which generally irritate the shit out of anyone within earshot and can cause hearing loss, are a staple at the FIFA soccer matches. A stadium full of drunken, horn-blowing fans can reach over 120 decibels, with some South Africans comparing the sound to that of “a stampeding herd of flatulent cape buffalo.”

But now the ubiquitous trumpets are blamed for an unexpected health issue. Soccer fans are showing up by the thousands in emergency rooms across South Africa, suffering from disfigured lips. Many fans are discovering that the combination of too much alcohol and excessive horn-blowing irreversibly distorts their lips, creating the nationwide freak show seen at many hospitals and clinics.

“This shit looks funny, mate, but it’s not,” exclaimed a British fan as he was leaving the stadium. “Every bloke ’round here ends up looking like Angelina Jolie or Jagger. Ain’t pretty at all.”

The South African Ministry of Health is issuing warnings to soccer fans to exercise moderation when blowing the horns. The agency has published an informative pamphlet, entitled Know Before You Blow, which is being handed out at the gates of soccer stadiums throughout the country in an effort to educate the public of the inherent dangers of the vuvuzelas.

“We used to only get patients with hearing loss due to the horns,” reported Ack Vorhees, a spokesman for a hospital in Johannesburg. “That and the occasional soccer fan who ended up with their horn wrapped around their neck courtesy of some enraged soccer hooligan. But now we’re seeing many more people with these unusual swollen lips. Without cosmetic surgery there’s no fixing that shit.”